Growing quilt celebrates grandparents raising grandchildren

Even if the pandemic means they can't get together for National Grandparents Day on Sunday, local members of the support group B.C. Grandparents Raising Grandchildren have still found a way to celebrate.

Through the magic of the social media, they will be showing off a quilt that has grown to 85 squares in the roughly 2 1/2 years since the project was started as a way to raise awareness and recognize and celebrate the work of grandparents who are raising their grandchildren.

Donna Eckert, the driving force behind the project, hopes to see the total reach 144 by the same time next year - all from contributions from seniors from across the province who are in the same boat.

That any grandparent who has taken on the responsibility of raising a child has the time to contribute is a bit of a miracle. As Eckert says, it doesn't get any easier as you get older.

"It's probably at times more difficult because you're more tired," Eckert said.

The trappings of the retired life are put on hold. No extended vacations, no weekday afternoons at the golf course. Those on limited incomes can find themselves holding down jobs to meet the added costs that come with making sure a youngster gets proper care. Children who have issues related to mental health and development only add to the workload.

In short, there are no days off.

"You don't get the respite because you can't send the kids to the grandparents for a break," Eckert said with a laugh.

Added to the workload is the stigma.

"Why have you got your grandchild? What did you do wrong to start off this whole mess?" Eckert said. "It's not a pleasant situation to be in."

Eckert said the group, which has a Facebook page, works as a place where seniors with a youngster or two in the household can turn when they need help - be it practical or emotional.

"A lot of it is referring to other agencies...it's even just (a forum for) ranting," she said. "If they need to rant and rave about something, they've got a safe place to go to say 'I don't know how I'm coping.' There's been tears, there's been just letting out steam."

But there are rewards, usually in the form of small tokens of appreciation, from the child and even from the parents themselves.

"They're not material rewards. They're the little things that melt your heart when they happen," Eckert said.

For more information on the group, email [email protected].