I was told recently by a customer that the Regional District of Fraser Fort George, under the leadership of Arnold Schwarzeneger and Gordon Campbell, has found a major cause of pollution and possibly a solution to this region's global warming. It's not the pulp mills or Husky or CN; it's not even the burning of slash piles as big as city hall as every one mistakenly thought. It's us rural folk with our wood stoves.
But that will all end very soon, as the regional district is having well-publicized meetings seeking our input before they bring in new laws to stop us rural polluters before we completely destroy this planet. I know that some of us who heat with wood may find it a little expensive but maybe we could just work harder. In defense of the government there are other very real issues like, what if we run out of fire wood in this region? Do we want to keep having global warming winters like this last one? How will the gas and electric companies make money for their shareholders? What about the loss of tax revenue? And most important to our leader, and I'm sure all of us rural folk as well, what would Arnold S. think if we don't at least try to stop the carnage?
Like most whiners who write to the paper, my motives are totally self-centred. We're only concerned about our own lifestyle. I sell outdoor furnaces and may not be able to after the regional district brings in this new law to protect us from them.
But there is some good news in all of this: you know the old saying when one door closes another door opens? Our company has been awarded exclusive marketing rights for a new product line called Cowpers (livestock diapers). That's right, the next order of environmental control is that us rural polluters will soon be legislated to put Cowpers on all our livestock and horses (chickens and cats will be exempt for now). Arnold and Gord anticipate huge revenue and many new jobs - good jobs. After all everyone knows that what's in a Cowper is not fertilizer, it's toxic waste and will need to be handled accordingly. It's just more smart leadership.
We really need leadership. If someone would have suggested that burning wood was a problem any time in the last 6,000 years we would have thought they were out of their minds, but not now. I'm sure that once we have the methane and wood stove problem solved this will really be the best place in the world.
But seriously, we all can imagine how hard it must be to rule over us people, having to think of new laws to keep us safe. I think we all should call our leaders at the regional district and our MLAs to encourage them and to assure them we are all in agreement and will support them. I know I would just like to give some of them a hug.
