Some people like to look forward to a new year and make bold optimistic predictions about what's in store.
I don't have a clue. I have enough trouble grappling with the present, and constant difficulty remembering the past. (There are some MLAs I've covered for years. I have to check the spelling of their names. Every. Single. Time.)
The future is beyond me.
A personal review of the past year makes that clear:
Alberta dealt three wild cards in a row that I didn't see coming. If you'd told me in January that Rachel Notley would be premier of Alberta, I would have laughed in your face. You mean that nice Rachel? Who worked in the B.C. legislature as an NDP aide in the 1990s?
Get outta here!
In January, she was leading a caucus of four souls in a legislature that had been controlled by the Conservatives for 44 years. On May 5, she won a huge majority, on the strength of being the most viable alternative after former premier Jim Prentice's tone-deaf incompetence was fully revealed.
That was a surprise, too. As was his graceless decision to resign his seat because he didn't get his way in the general vote.
And if you'd told me in May that Alberta would be the first jurisdiction to follow B.C.'s lead in adopting a carbon tax, I would have started laughing all over again. Emission-spewing Alberta will have almost the same carbon tax as B.C. by 2018. Go figure.
If you'd told me in August when the federal campaign started that Justin Trudeau would win a majority, I would have smiled indulgently and politely listed a number of reasons why it couldn't happen. No party had ever won from third place (only 36 seats).
Conservatives were stronger than Liberals in the polls on Day 1. The NDP was actually ahead, and if Mulcair didn't win, he would at least stop Trudeau from doing so.
So much for those plot lines. The NDP folded, disenchantment with Stephen Harper hardened and Trudeau soared.
Also confounding was the week of niqab preoccupation over whether women can hide their faces during public citizenship ceremonies.
If you'd told me in January that the City of Victoria would be outdistancing Saanich by a wide margin when it comes to making astonishing news, I would have told you to jump off the new Blue Bridge. (Oh wait, it's still not built.)
In January, Saanich Mayor Richard Atwell was hiding from the municipal hall because of the spyware on his computer, complaining about his own police department and was in the early lead for newsmaker of the year. I tweeted: "Buckle up, Saanich. It's wheels up on the flight to Crazytown."
His complaint about the police was tossed, but an independent report said he had every right to worry about the spyware. The Saanich scene - on the surface, at least - calmed down and Victoria took centre stage.
They continued bobbling the bridge, contemplated a tent city in Topaz Park out of desperation and tried to cover up the bewildering story of Police Chief (for now) Frank Elsner's personal social-media relationship with the wife of one of his subordinates.
If you'd told me earlier that an auditor general doesn't have to be an actual auditor, I'd have wondered about your grasp of reality.
But then the government rewrote the laws governing the auditor general for local government, after a fiasco with the first occupant of the office. And it dropped the requirement that the office holder be an actual auditor.
"Not a primary concern," said cabinet minister Peter Fassbender. The explanation was that since the reports from that office are only recommendations, they're not technically "audits."
So there's no need for the auditor general for local governments to be an auditor.
The deputy AGLG still has to be an auditor. And the second AGLG appointed this year is an auditor in any event, so it's an academic point.
But it left Opposition critics scratching their heads.
"It's a brand new approach," Fassbender explained.
Go figure.
If you'd told me to stay poised and ready for anything, because constant surprises are a fact of modern life, I would have taken it to heart.
Here's hoping next year's surprises are all pleasant ones.
