It makes me sad to think of those who have left 12-step programs because of misunderstanding, anger, rage or denial.I read/hear all these reasons and many are legitimate to me. It is not the steps which fail but rather, the fallible humans who interpret the program.We are after all, in 12 step rooms because we know we are unwell. The literature clearly says we are not saints but oftentimes I/we forget this vital fact.
Some in the rooms think the program belongs only to them.There have been (and are) attempts, through language and judgment to keep others out.Some in the rooms state you cannot share your experience (or do not belong or are not in recovery) if you take any mind/mood-altering drug, yet with psychotic disorders, mind-altering medications are prescribed, ones which target the mind for hallucinations and delusions. In depression and bipolar disorder, mood-altering meds are given to alter depressive or high moods.These medications do not cause euphoria and you most certainly won't find anyone working the streets, selling their body to get more Prozac for their disease of addiction.
There are those also who say you are not in recovery if you take methadone or suboxone, when some hold stable jobs, are not conducting crime, selling their body or hurting others (plus are not dying, the most important point in recovery today). This is particularly annoying, when after I hear such words, I see this person who made these misguided (often judgmental) statements, go outside and vape or light a cigarette and inhale their nicotine drugs.
The program clearly states our problem is of a spiritual malady and that drug/alcohol use is a symptom of that.Yet many leave the program because of the G-O-D word; it is a common complaint and perhaps a reflection of their reaction to the fallible people who mistakenly tout religion in the rooms.
I need to critically evaluate all of what I hear and not allow another's misunderstanding of the program to drive me back out (as I know that is my addiction talking to me).This is why I write all of the above, to encourage you, if and when you enter the rooms, to not allow your addiction to drive you out, through our own, often fallible human mistakes.
I believe 12 steps work for any life problem that ails us. Just the other day, I found a 12-step group named Clutters Anonymous. I chuckled at first then realized how life threatening and disrupting hoarding can be, and oftentimes it begins innocuously through clutter (just like addiction does, with that first drink I took as a teen).
Thus I am wanting to present the program to you, for all of what ails us.It is a design for living.You can take what works and leave the rest. It won't hurt but rather, if you take a leap of faith, it will change your life in ways you could never imagine.You cannot even dream what the incredible outcomes will be.
I have to stop typing due to word limits and will later present my interpretation of the first step for all those in the world with regular life issues (anger, pain, resentment, stress, grudges, jealousy, insecurity, anxiety, fear, loathing, judgment, etc). The 12 steps work for everyone, not just those with an addictive disorder.I believe that if everyone worked it, the world would most certainly change.
It is even something that can be taught to our children because it will ease any angst they might feel about the world they live in today, particularly those with social media and bullying or any other life stressors they might experience today.
- Questions for Ann? Send your submissions (anonymously, if you choose) to [email protected] and we'll pass them along.
