The following column was submitted to PrinceGeorgeMatters from Chelsea Gibson, a Certified Life Skills Coach, International Best-Selling Author and owner of Wild Rose Wellness.
Are you feeling emotionally overloaded?
When you interact with people, sit down for a moment alone, read a text or scroll your Facebook feed, you are going to be confronted with information, thoughts and events that trigger emotions.
This response to the outside and inside world is completely normal and most days the emotions come in and flow out with ease.
You may be wondering “Why am I so exhausted this year?” Your emotions are harder to manage this year because of the global pandemic's impact on our mental health.
It’s important to remember every person has emotions that they are more comfortable with than other emotions.
Intense emotions that are left unprocessed will show up in your physical health, in your relationships and sometimes in emotional flooding.
What do we do with our emotions?
Here are three steps that will assist you in working with and communicating your emotions in healthy ways in the new year:
Name the emotion
One reason emotions can be difficult to manage is because we don’t recognize which emotion it is. Many of my clients were taught that emotions were bad and inconvenient they never learned how to be aware of which emotion they were feeling.
If you tend to use overarching statements like “I feel bad” you are not acknowledging the specific emotions which makes them difficult to process. That’s like trying to get a colleague's attention in a room full of people and saying “hey you!”, they aren’t going to know which person you are talking to and neither does your brain/ body when you don’t name the emotion.
There are more than just the primary emotions like joy, sadness or anger.
I’d suggest you google the Emotion Wheel to see how many emotions there are! Look at the wheel and see if what you’re actually feeling is a mix of one-to-three different emotions and name how you’re feeling.
Communicate the emotion
With another set of restrictions we are going to be spending more time around those close to us.
Self-responsible language is a process of communicating how an event or person has emotionally affected us without lashing out or placing blame.
Start by naming the event, name how you feel (one-to-three emotions) and then say what you actually needed or what you made the situation mean.
As you get used to the process of naming the event and what emotion is triggered the easier communicating your emotions gets.
Many people aren’t used to speaking about their emotions so be gentle with yourself as you get used to communicating how you feel with those you love.
What do you need?
Once you have become aware of how you are feeling now you ask yourself “What do I need?”
With every emotion and in different situations your needs will vary and there are healthy and unhealthy ways to channel our emotions.
Make sure to be aware if what you need will contribute to you or make matters worse. You may feel compelled to call a friend, go for a walk, deep breathe, practice yoga class or journal in a notebook.
I have taught meditation for more than eight years and in that time, I have realized that one reason meditation is difficult is because it’s uncomfortable to sit with our emotions. Meditation is a scientifically proven way to work with our emotions and isn’t the easiest one.
If you’d like to meditate start with sitting in a quiet room and deep breathing (count of 4 to start) then sit with your emotion and let it be until it shifts.
Part of being human is the dynamic array of emotions we experience in a given day. It’s important to know that no matter what the circumstances your feelings are valid and neither good or bad.
For more information on emotional flooding and emotional health, check out the free video below and more than 90 others that could help you during this time!
If you need urgent support with your emotions, call the 24-hour Northern BC Crisis Line at 1-888-562-1214.
