Vivian Tom may have told the court she forgives the man who beat her daughter to death but it's with profoundly mixed emotions that she's done so.
"That's something that I have to deal with every day, struggle with every day," she said Wednesday during an interview outside the Prince George courthouse after Garrett Steven George, 27, was sentenced to a further eight years and four months in prison for the 2013 manslaughter death of his common law spouse, Destiny Rae Tom.
"I know that God will not let any hatred into heaven. If one person gets into heaven with hatred it won't be heaven anymore and I want to do my best to be with my daughter, to be with the rest of my family and I know won't get there if I hate.
"So that's something I'm dealing with on a daily basis, is to continue to do my best to forgive."
During court proceedings, the court was told of a relationship in which George worked to dominate and control Destiny Tom through violence, threats and intimidation. Twice he was convicted of assault after leaving her battered, bruised and bleeding but despite court orders that he stay away, George continued to live with her.
It was a frustrating thing for her parents to see.
"We didn't agree with the relationship but we didn't try to force her," Vivian Tom said.
"We did try to keep her home [rather than let her move with George to his home community], we moved her out of there and even in jail he would stalk her until he got her back.
"And because of the baby, I guess, she decided to go back to him."
Vivian Tom also told the court she wants to maintain the relationship between George and his now seven-year-old daughter, Cassidy, who is now in her grandparents' care. Tom, who was elected chief of the Wet'suwet'en First Nation in July, cited cultural tradition as the reason.
"That's part of our traditional beliefs, is to honour the father clan," she said. "Because it's our belief it's the father clan that looks after the mother clan at the end."
That said, the family is not happy with the sentence. George was sentenced to 11 years in prison less credit for time served, working out to a further eight years and four months.
"I don't think that's enough because of what he did and the things he continually did," Destiny's father, Andy said. "There are a lot of things they didn't mention about the other girls he did the same thing to...it should be at least 20 years."
Andy Jr., Destiny's brother, differed with George's assertion that she would attack him.
"I never once seen her try to hit him...she was too kind hearted to raise a fist to him," he said.
He recalled intervening at a party one time to save George from his brother, who had him by the throat as Destiny was looking on.
"I was just going to let his brother choke him out because how many times he did that to her but she looked at me with tears in her eyes, and I had to step in because I didn't want her crying."
As it is, Vivian said she and her husband are focused on giving their granddaughter unconditional love.
"Right now, when she cries, she cries for her mom and her dad," she said. "And so we do our best not to put her dad down...we want her to be strong."
