It is an oft-heard phrase, especially aimed at interesting elders or people who have been through surprising experiences.
"You ought to write a book."
It was said to Normand Richard, and said by a psychiatrist, so Richard took that message literally. He recently became that author by self-publishing his life story in the book he called Surviving My Family, Thriving In Yours.
"In May of 1995, due to an ongoing depression problem, my family doctor sent me to see a psychiatrist," said Richard.
"After two full sessions, and hearing about my very dysfunctional family life, and about the sad story of a very pretty young lady I phoned about in 1994, the doctor could see how distraught I was. He told me it was one of the saddest stories he had ever heard and after all I had survived, I should write a book."
That "pretty young lady" was a Burns Lake girl he fell into unrequited love with, or at least the possibility of love, but for heartbreaking reasons it was destined not to be. It's hard to read it and feel unmoved by the romance of it.
The subtitle of the book is A Very Open Memoir. He lays out the details of a childhood spent with parents who undermined his self esteem, knocked him down instead of building him up, dragged his formative years through their alcoholism and untreated mental health issues, and setting him on life's path with a bad map.
His story is not extreme, compared to the violence and crime and zealotry of many parents that skew their children's lives.
Richard's story is not presented as a tale of woe wrapped in excuses, or to paint him as a victim. Rather, he simply relates his facts in a common voice that underscores all the more how bad leadership in the family home is a frequent problem and a local problem. Although he lived a lot of his life in the Kootenays and Vancouver Island, Richard also lived large portions of his life in the north.
He currently resides in the Quesnel area. He worked at the copper mine in Granisle, played hockey for the Burns Lake Braves, and some of the writing of this book happened on the Barkerville highway at his home but also at pullouts alongside the road where he would halt his drive if the inspiration to write happened to strike him.
The familiar locations of his life's narrative serve to show just how relevant his experiences are to others, including the times of stress and pain.
"The main focus of my book is to tell parents to share meals with their children and engage them often in positive conversation about family discipline, education plans, safe sex and career plans," Richard said.
