When Missy Dunn was struggling with depression, she couldn’t find the book that she needed to read.
So she decided to write her own, in the hope that it would help others.
She has now completed her book Flawed. Perfectly, which details her deeply vulnerable experiences with childhood trauma, sexual abuse, mental illness, divorce, and attempted suicide.
“I knew my story was like a lot of other people's stories, so I just sort of figured if it can help one person, then it will be worth writing, but it was very vulnerable and raw to write,” said the Fort St. John resident.
The book begins in her childhood, which was affected by her mother’s own mental health struggles. Dunn says she wasn’t given the building blocks of life that she needed in her childhood to help her through her teen years and into adulthood.
She said these experiences left her with the inability to ask for help when she needed it.
“A lot of people say, ‘Oh, just call helpline, or oh, just ask for help’ and the problem is, is that not everybody can do that,” said Dunn, adding that when she told the adults in her life about the abuse she was facing, they did not help her.
“The book then develops into the decisions, the bad decisions, I made as an adult, including how I went through two divorces, and one of them was really bad. I had two children, who I was trying to raise up as a single mom.”
Dunn says her second divorce pushed her into a depression for which she was eventually hospitalized twice, once against her will.
“I take full responsibility for the bad choices I made, I don't blame them on my childhood, I don't blame them on my mother. I take full responsibility of the choices that I need but the book just evolved into how those choices came to be,” explains Dunn.
“A lot of people I find, are very curious and confused as to why a loved one could possibly try to end their life, especially a mom who has two beautiful children and seems to have her life together, when I really didn't have my life together.”
Flawed. Perfectly details what it was like to be hospitalized against her wishes, and then what it was like to finally get the help she needed.
“That's why I wrote the book, because I just wanted people to understand that there is a light at the end. You may go through some really dark times, but there's always something in the end that can help out.”
She said she also hoped the book provided insights for the family members and friends as to why people with depression do they things they do, or why suicide even seems to be an option for some people.
Dunn says that while she will always be living with clinical depression, she has a great team of doctors who have been with her step by step and now feels very light and at peace.
“I know myself, how if I’m starting to slip that I know how to ask for help now, which I think is most important thing is, I didn't feel like I have that option ever to ask for help,” said Dunn.
“I've got a really good support system, which I never had before. I know how to ask for help so I'm in a good place.”
Flawed. Perfectly is available through Amazon and Missy Dunn’s website.
If you or someone you know is thinking about ending their life or are concerned about someone who is, you can call:
- 9-1-1 if someone is in immediate danger to themselves or others
- Northern BC Crisis Line - 1-888-562-1214
- BC Crisis line - 1-866-661-3311
- Text CONNECT to 686868 (the Kids Help Line) or call 1-800-668-6868
- Canada Suicide Prevention Line - 1-833-456-4566
