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Lost in media's ideal images

It is a challenging time to be a man or a boy.

It is a challenging time to be a man or a boy. Looking at how we are presented in the media, are we supposed to be superheroes with unbelievable biceps, gigolos or buffoons? Are we supposed to be sports superstars, rock stars or business moguls?

It is no easier to be a woman or a girl. Is today's Hollywood standard of feminine beauty really one's most valuable attribute?

Never before have we been so surrounded by media, from the moment we wake up until the time we go to sleep, confusing us with conflicting messages about right and wrong.

Part of the problem is that we are comparing ourselves with images that just are not real. As comedian Joan Rivers said, "I wish I had a twin, so I could know what I'd look like without plastic surgery."

If they existed, the tough guy superheroes of movies and video games who shoot now and ask questions later would most likely be dead, or wake up every night screaming. The men who sleep with multiple women would probably find themselves with several STDs and difficulty sustaining meaningful relationships.

If we add to this the disillusionment we feel when our media heroes fall, we can understand why we are so lost.

Perhaps the problem is that we are focusing on things that really don't matter. Maybe it's not all about domination, money and having a particular body type.

What is it then that brings true satisfaction and happiness to our existence? These are questions that have been pondered by sages for thousands of years, and it is fascinating how similar the answers have been.

Essentially, they have concluded that we need to focus on becoming our best selves, and in so doing bring good to all of humanity. Many things happen outside of us which are beyond our control, but we always control whether or not we will live with integrity, respect our neighbours, admit our mistakes, and seek truth.

When examining the media today, perhaps we need to ask meaningful questions about what we are allowing into our minds. When we see a character, whether real or fictional, we can ask ourselves, "Is that the kind of person I want to be?" When we hear a song we can ask, "Are those the values that I want to believe in?" When we take in any media we can ask, "Is this worth my time? Is it helping me to get to where I want to go?"

In essence, the reason for the prevalence of media which conflicts with essential human truths is because we accept it. We watch it, and we spend money on it.

Media can, however, be very powerful in bringing about positive change. Gandhi, for example, understood the influence of modern journalism and used it to his advantage. There is no way that he could have garnered the international support for his movement without it.

Media also improves when we demand it. We need only look at the racism, sexism and substance abuse that passed as humour in old films to see how things can change.

Amelioration comes about when we hold ourselves to a higher standard and are careful about what we consume. Just as we become what we eat, we become what we watch and listen to.

It is indeed a challenging time to be living, wading through a media soup of conflicting messages on a daily basis.

As we grow clear on what is meaningful to us, mindful about what we consume, and also demand better media, it becomes easier and easier to create a world we are proud to pass on to our children.

Gerry Chidiac is a champion for social enlightenment, inspiring others to find their greatness in making the world a better place. For more of his writings, go to www.gerrychidiac.com