We all face challenges in life. At times we come up against such horrific conditions that we fear for our lives or the lives of loved ones. It is said that, "There are not atheists in a foxhole." In other words, we face times when all that we can do is pray for a miracle.
Rabbi Harold Kushner, author of When Bad Things Happen To Good People, tells us, "People who pray for miracles usually don't get miracles...But people who pray for courage, for strength to bear the unbearable, for the grace to remember what they have left instead of what they have lost, very often find their prayers answered...Their prayers helped them to tap hidden reserves of faith and courage which were not available to them before."
The fact of the matter is that life happens. Our cars break down, we face financial hardship, people betray us, we get sick, natural disasters strike. In the case of Kushner, his own son died at a young age. We usually do nothing to deserve these misfortunes. What defines us as people is not what happens to us, but how we respond.
When I was in my early 20s, I participated in an Outward Bound course in northern Ontario. The goal of Outward Bound Schools is to teach people to dig down deep into their resources to overcome challenges and to show compassion to others. In World War II it was observed that when ships were sunk, it was actually the older, more resourceful sailors who survived, not the young and strong ones. Outward Bound uses outdoor adventure to teach young people to tap into their inner greatness, and it has been highly successful. I came away from my course confident that I could face what life brought my way. This training served me well as I began my teaching career. The question was not "Will I survive this class?", it was "How will I overcome this challenge?" The same mindset has served me in facing every difficulty that life has thrown my way.
How does one overcome these challenges? Our first instinct may be to pray for a miracle, to pray that the other person or the situation changes. The fact of the matter is that people have free will, it is unethical for us to impose our own will on another person, and, I would argue, it is wrong for us to ask the divine to do this on our behalf. Kushner points out that it is rare that situations change either. What is more likely to change is the person praying. By seeking the divine, or that small still voice that speaks inside of us, we tap into a strength that defies all understanding. We are able to see that what we are facing is can be overcome and we know that we are not alone in conquering it.
Life will knock us down. We are great when we continue to get back up, and that ability to get up is more often than not the very miracle that we have prayed for.
